And just when I needed someone to explain the past fourteen months to me, I found these little words today.
"Let's make better mistakes tomorrow. Let's scratch our heads and give up and wake up and try it again. Let's fail at digging the well the first three times to get it right the fourth. Let's build faster horses, and then strap rocket ships onto them. Let's start a company, let's watch it fail, and then let's start another one. Let's be the boss. Let's take the boss down. Let's order too much of something just to see where our limits are. Let's take a chance precisely because it might fail. Let's take the hard way out. let's go to the moon. Fuck it; let's go to the moon again. Let's quit our jobs. Let's work at being better at what we do by fucking up faster , not less. let's fuck up really fast. Let's wrestle sharks, fight monsters, and disagree with the board. lets borrow so much money it becomes someone else's problem. Let's start a 10 hour drive by announcing "I'm not into you anymore" Let's dump everything out of the garage onto the sidewalk and build something really cool in that space. Let's start out to build a better mousetrap, and halfway there lets decide to jump on the mice's team. Let's bet on a longshot. Let's buy her a drink. Let's start baking bread in our cubicle. Let's try bringing fresh water to distant villages precisely because we have no idea how to do it. Let's pool our money. Let's take their money. Let's solve that hard problem. You know that one that keeps you up at night? Let's tackle that bastard. let it kick our ass a few times, and then finally get it right. Let's find out what's at the bottom of the ocean. Let's tame the Kraken. Let's just fucking tell people we've read Infinite Jest and move on. Let's forgive our parents. Let's do something with the god damned planet. Let's rent an electric generator and open a food cart that sells nothing but frosted PopTarts, but makes a lot of fucking noise. Let's have a breakthrough. Let's have a breakdown. Let's agree that bruises fade, bones heal, hearts mend, and that tomorrow we're right back on that horse and that this time, THIS TIME! we've at least got a rocket strapped to its back."
It was only fourteen months ago that I quit my job, broke up with a very lovely boyfriend, put everything into storage, and bought a one way ticket to another country without confirmation of a job and no savings. Since then I've lived in eleven different houses in two countries and three states, signed five job contracts, traveled nine countries, drove across the United States in a Uhaul, danced until the sun rose, had my heart broken, and broke a couple hearts myself.
I'm a teeny bit tired.